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Life in the closet can be like being on the Starship Enterprise: When you're under attack, you put up a reflective shield. This defensive maneuver uses up all the ship's energy -- meaning there's none left to do anything else.
Gay/lesbian workers expend tremendous energy putting up such defenses, says Warren Blumenfeld, assistant professor of multicultural studies at Iowa State University, who has written extensively on internalized homophobia and the coming-out process. The effort workers invest in hiding their sexual orientation takes a toll on their productivity, as well as their emotional and physical health.
But gays and lesbians who are closeted at work aren't the only ones downplaying their sexuality, according to Yale Law School professor Kenji Yoshino, author of Covering: The Hidden Assault on Our Civil Rights. Even after coming out, many gay/lesbian workers cover, or minimize references to certain aspects of their lives and personalities.
Understanding how and why this happens can help you express yourself more freely.
How Gays and Lesbians Cover at Work
Yoshino says gay/lesbian workers have gone through three stages. In the beginning, no one was out -- the fear of being fired was too great. Then came "don't ask, don't tell."
Today, the prevailing philosophy is "don't flaunt it." "It's OK to be gay," Yoshino says. "Just don't be an effeminate man or butch woman. Don't wear flamboyant clothes or put up rainbow flags."
Yoshino says there are four types of covering at work:
Appearance: "There is immense pressure in the corporate world to be straight-acting. Dress conservatively. Men should not wear earrings, but they also shouldn't be fastidious about their clothes."
Affiliation: Refraining from saying things like "my boyfriend and I" or "we went on an Olivia cruise, just for lesbians."
Activism: Includes ignoring a borderline antigay joke or not asking the company to donate to a Gay Pride event.
Association: Deliberately avoiding flamboyant colleagues. And the decision to join a gay affinity group poses a huge dilemma for many gay/lesbian workers at large corporations.
Why Take Cover?
One reason gays and lesbians cover at work is fear of being punished for nonconformity. And antidiscrimination statutes may offer little protection. "You may not be able to be fired there for being gay," Yoshino says. "But if a company wants to get rid of you, they'll find a reason -- especially if you're perceived as effeminate, butch or gender-atypical."
Gays and lesbians also face internal struggles. "Being overtly out at work makes it concrete, real and irreversible," Blumenfeld says. "We may fear a loss of respect by coworkers or clients if we're too out. And most workers, new ones especially, have only so much ‘social capital.' They may not want to spend it on something that might alienate colleagues or management."
Gay and lesbian job seekers cover, too. Yoshino says gay/lesbian students in his "Sexual Orientation and Law" course -- many of them actively out on campus -- often ask him to change the course's name for fear of what potential employers might think.
"That would violate my integrity," Yoshino says. "But it's also not good for them. Why would they want to work for a firm where the name of my course is an issue? I understand gay students might feel vulnerable in the hiring process. But they should stick to their guns and be themselves."
Yoshino admits covering might be harder in a profession "less privileged or liberal" than law, but even he has felt the pressure.
When Yoshino began teaching at Yale nine years ago, he was told he would have a better chance at tenure if he were a "homosexual professional" rather than a "professional homosexual" -- a professor who happens to be gay rather than one who concentrates on gay/lesbian issues.
He ignored the advice. "As soon as I had the courage to not cover, I was embraced by my colleagues. The demands to cover are often self-imposed. The situation may not be as bad as people imagine it to be."